negative utopia

oh boy!
do i hate being snubbed and ditched
all the same time.
it sucks even more
when you know why.

but when the anger peels off
when the smoke clears
it really should be
the reason why
i finally have the guts
to make the step of change.

to guard my heart
against the whims of the world.
and expose it more
to the glory of the Maker.

if after so long
and so much words
there can still be no honesty
that you still have to consider
and hide
then what's the bloody point?