Addicted to Tardiness

I am always fucking late for anything, especially for things in the mornings. Yes, for work, for class, for anything. So much that I don't even know whether I have a reason for being late these days when I think I might have one.

Most times, I just find it difficult to wake up in the mornings. But these days, I can't get to sleep at night a lot  because of anxiety. Anxiety over (not) getting work in the U.S. and my longer term future is giving me sleepless nights. When that happens, I can't sleep until 5 in the morning, and I have to get up to get to where I need to be by 9/10 in the morning. It's just a disaster.

But I am also late generally because of my tendency to keep late nights, sometimes doing nothing, but others doing more researching and reporting for stories I am working on. There is just no one reason why I am always late in the mornings. It's usually a matrix and it has become too much of a habit. I am addicted to tardiness.

And I fucking hate it.