what holds in the future?

in about a fortnight's time, my friends will begin term at a university. while i am still in army. this is not about being plagued by my mistake. this is not about me not knowing that they have served their time and that i have to also. this is about the future. i have been thinking of what holds in the future and i am bloody terrified.

while there's a tangible fear that as people move on to a different chapter of their lives, they will close an old one. however good the old chapter was. i fear losing friends. i fear that i will lose my own identity. now that i have accepted that i will be starting term at NUS next fall. i am beginning to really think about what i really want to do at the university.

i want to be a journalist. but teaching is something that has been on my heart. so do i do arts or reapply to mass comm at ntu? i mean, whether i can make it to mass comm is another matter. but really. does liking to teach means that God wants me to take it seriously?